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posted ago by BigSkyRattler ago by BigSkyRattler +55 / -0

So, I got to thinking about getting a new gat (a state of mind I am in quite literally constantly) and I was looking at where I wanted to do the transfer. First off, I got mad I can't order it from the catalog over the phone or online and have it on my doorstep next business day. Second, I came to realize that my go-to guy, a man I shall simply refer to as "Wonkey Eye Will" closed up shop a few years ago and it made me remember a bunch of little things about his shop, and in thinking about it I'm pretty sure "Wonkey Eye Will" was in fact an OG autist. My reasoning is as follows.

  1. Will had the cheapest little rental space imaginable and it was stuffed almost to the bursting point with the most ridiculous guns you can buy.
  2. He would constantly tell you about the impending revolution and how it will be fought and won by both fat old men with their hunting/precision match rifles sitting in hidey-holes taking potshots at tyrants and the next generation of freedom loving Americans too young or dumb to fear death and thus willing to charge head on into gunfights.
  3. The man bought a 16" revolver for the shop before the heritage rough rider was hitting r/gundeals.
  4. Had a Serbu single shot 50bmg sitting front and center for a while and would throw in 5 rounds of API-T if you bought it with a box of 50 ball.
  5. Bought guns that he had to know no sane person would buy just because he liked to talk about them or he was just showing off something he really bought for himself, such as, a Cobray Terminator, a blunder buss with a bag labeled "rocks n' shit", a revolver with a 16in barrel, KelTec shit, literally always had Hi-points (one of which was a dollar print that reappeared sporadically), and various other little oddities.
  6. Never wore closed toe shoes, and always wore shorts and some kind of tacky button up shirt.

I miss Wonkey Eyed Will's gunshop.