I looked for some hot dog bun handgrip but I found a hot dog cannon. ??
You're a human gun squirrel. ?
For 2k$+ you can get a East India Company Pattern 1771 Brown Bess with a 1776 marked lock with a fresh stock from Ima.
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Protect the victims?! What a novel idea! Just wait until the fuckers figure out they can dox his neighbour since he's not a victim.