7
Probably-Pooping 7 points ago +7 / -0

The encryption stuff sounds great until I remember I don’t have any friends…

5
Probably-Pooping 5 points ago +5 / -0

You’re not the boss of me!!

Also,

How you doin’, babe?

1
Probably-Pooping 1 point ago +1 / -0

You tend to get what you pay for. They’ve cut a lot of corners to get the price that low.

9
Probably-Pooping 9 points ago +9 / -0

Like that annoying kid in school that would always change the rules of games when he was losing, then rub it in your face when he wins the new way.

Even though you’d like to kick the shit out of that kid, you can’t because his daddy is the school principal.

Fuck you Jerem-… I mean ATF goons.

2
Probably-Pooping 2 points ago +2 / -0

So you’re saying I don’t need to carry a 9mm anymore? Hmm…

2
Probably-Pooping 2 points ago +2 / -0

Basically, yeah.

It also works as a natural laxative and sleep aid.

3
Probably-Pooping 3 points ago +3 / -0

Ya know, I think something is wrong with me - I literally cannot vomit. I can’t burp either.

I’m kinda jealous of everyone else that can. I always just get a horrible case of the ‘oh my goodness, my insides are going to explode and I’m going to die’ diarrhea.

I’m convinced one of these days I’m going to shit out my own intestines. In my last dying moments, I will look like I have grown a tail with my insides dangling on the outside.

3
Probably-Pooping 3 points ago +3 / -0

I’ve moved on to drinking Ayahuasca. You can drink it on the shitter. In fact, that is the best place to drink it.

4
Probably-Pooping 4 points ago +4 / -0

Exquisite. This is art. Such a unique and beautiful amalgamation of flavors from aristocratic, bourgeoisie, and proletariat classes.

A symbol of unity, and peace through strength. A reminder that no matter who we are, we can all break bread and mag dump into trash together.

This is deserving of a Michelin Star of Gunnit cuisine. Chef’s kiss.

5
Probably-Pooping 5 points ago +5 / -0

Oh cool! I was wondering when I would finally get an invite to a super secret club where we talk about our desires to kidnap a governor with other likeminded individuals.

Fuck off with that shit, Fed. I’m just here for pictures of feet. Show me your toenails or GTFO.

8
Probably-Pooping 8 points ago +8 / -0

I’m insulted that you think I’m so poor I have to print my own guns.

I can afford to buy things in a store.

Granted, that store is Palmetto State Armory, but still…

4
Probably-Pooping 4 points ago +4 / -0

This post inspires me to sing a song:

“OP the red-nosed fedboi, makes some very spicy posts.

And if you ever saw them, you might even say ‘they glow’.

All of the non-crayon-eaters, read his posts and call OP names.

They know better than to let some fedboi know about their reindeer games.”

2
Probably-Pooping 2 points ago +2 / -0

The moon is made out of cheese.

Nestled deeply in a limburger crater on the far side of the moon is a nazi base. You see, when the war was coming to an end many nazi scientists escaped to the moon to avoid punishment.

Wernher Van Braun wasn’t strictly inventing rockets for the US Military. No, he was trying to secretly bring his friends and family home. But there was a problem - Germans love Limburger cheese more than life itself.

Six American missions were successful in landing men on the moon (in seven attempts). All seven missions made contact with the Limburger base. None were successful in convincing the Germans to return. Apollo 13 refused to land because the cheese smell was so disgusting it caused astronaut Fred Haise to become violently ill onboard. The ship failure was just a cover story (and a damn good movie).

After billions of dollars spent, and little to show for it, NASA finally gave up. They haven’t sent a rocket to the moon in over 50 years.

So in summary: Yes, many men have walked on the moon. The first was even earlier than you thought. Some people are still up there today. You cannot stand between a German and a giant ball of stinky cheese.

2
Probably-Pooping 2 points ago +2 / -0

Be the change you want to see in the world.

You probably own a gun, right? You probably have a few toes at least. Pull your socks off, take some pics, and get to work.

1
Probably-Pooping 1 point ago +1 / -0

I must have this. I need this in my… life.

8
Probably-Pooping 8 points ago +8 / -0

Now way man. Hell half my weapon lights and optics stopped working because I’ve never bothered to replace batteries. Biden knows me too well. There’s zero chance in hell I’m buying watch batteries for the fingerprint reader in my CCW.

10
Probably-Pooping 10 points ago +10 / -0

I advocate for a smart president plan. We should require testing to prove that future presidential candidates are not dementia-riddled assbags.

7
Probably-Pooping 7 points ago +7 / -0

That’s when you shout “DIBS!” And run off with it.

9
Probably-Pooping 9 points ago +9 / -0

I don’t know anything about anime, Japanese gun culture, or any other weeb shit.

All I know is some dude recently built a homemade pipe gun and killed former PM Shinzo Abe. That showed a level of rebellion, creativity, ingenuity and testosterone not normally seen in the last three generations.

Shame that brainwashed fuck used it on the wrong person…

7
Probably-Pooping 7 points ago +7 / -0

The small frame of the P365 coupled with its high capacity and lack of snag points or sharp edges makes it a tempting piece to smuggle in the old prison pocket.

But the devil is in the details - those unreliable strikers go off seemingly at random.

It’s best to not risk it. The aggressive stippling of a S&W Shield might seem like it would cause uncomfortable chafing - and the truth is, it almost certainly will - it’s still the safer, better option.

4
Probably-Pooping 4 points ago +4 / -0

Fuck management indeed.

Get this: my fuckin’ HOA came to my house and issued me a citation because a lamppost in my yard was leaning three degrees to the north. They took pictures and held a level up to it to create “evidence” of my negligence.

If I answered the door dressed like OP, I bet they would have left without argument.

9
Probably-Pooping 9 points ago +9 / -0

Nah man. Imagine this - You’re walking down the middle of a narrow street. A car is coming so you need to step up onto the side walk.

One side has has an Army Ranger fully kitted-out on patrol.

The other side has a naked homeless vagrant hopped-up on speed. He’s looking you dead in the eye while violently beating his limp dick and mumbling incoherently about the coming rapture.

Which side of the road are you walking toward?

If you say you’re more afraid of the soldier, you’re a damned liar. Naked men with nothing left to lose are the scariest fucking things on this planet.

7
Probably-Pooping 7 points ago +7 / -0

AR-15 + backup shotty. No Armor except Old Glory protecting your modesty.

That is a hero’s loadout of I’ve ever seen one.

🇺🇸🫡

4
Probably-Pooping 4 points ago +4 / -0

u/GNN_RNR carrying this entire dom on his shoulders along with that plate carrier.

God speed fren.

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